"The funniest people I know seem to be the ones surrounded by darkness. And that’s probably why they’re the funniest. The deeper the pit, the more humor you need to dig yourself out of it.
The thought of suicide was always there, an option behind glass that I could break in case of an emergency. I glamorized the idea of constructing my own exit.”
"If you know a really funny person who isn’t tortured and broken inside, I’d say A) they’ve just successfully hidden it from you, B) their fucked-uppedness is buried so deep down that even they’re in denial about it, or C) they’re just some kind of a mystical creature I can’t begin to understand.
You soon learned that being funny builds a perfect, impenetrable wall around you — a buffer that keeps anyone from getting too close and realizing how much you suck. The more you hate yourself, the stronger you need to make the barrier and the further you have to push people away. In other words, the better you have to be at comedy.
In your formative years, you wind up creating a second, false you — a clown that can go out and represent you, outside the barrier. The clown is always joking, always “on,” always drawing all of the attention in order to prevent anyone from poking away at the barrier and finding the real person behind it. The clown is the life of the party, the classroom joker, the guy up on stage — as different from the “real” you as possible. Again, the goal is to create distance.
You do it because if people hate the clown, who cares? That’s not the real you. So you’re protected.
But the side effect is that if people love the clown … well, you know the truth. You know how different it’d be if they met the real you.”
- David Wong
“Comedy, like the Force, the moon, and what we now know about Michael Jackson, has a light and a dark side. And sometimes it feels like the dark side is winning. A study from the British Journal of Psychology found that comedians are more likely than others to admit to being easily distracted, antisocial, and compulsive and have less interest in connecting with other humans. Most of us would look at those qualities and say, “Sooo, comedians are kind of introverted?” Psychologists look at them and say, “CRAZY!” Probably because psychologists are still mad about flunking out of comedy school. Not good, either way. Jerry the Mouse straight up entered a suicide pact with his frenemy Tom.”
I scratch and bite.” She warned. “You’ll crawl and beg too.” He promised.(via ohhhkat)